Every month in YouLead, we provide you with email copy that you can use to inform, invest, encourage, and praise your volunteers and staff. Following is an example of the emails we write for your use and encourage you to send out on a weekly basis. Click here if you’d like to try out a free month of YouLead.

A recent study conducted by Bibb Latané and John Darley tracked the behaviors of students at Columbia University. Enlisted to complete a survey, some students were left alone, while some were in a room with other students. As they filled out their surveys, a “crisis” emerged as smoke filled the room. Of those sitting alone in a room, 75 percent got up and alerted someone about the smoke. But only 38 percent of those sitting in a group reported the smoke. The conclusion? The groups failed to respond to the crisis because they looked to others in the group for cues on how to interpret the event. When the others in the group didn’t respond to the smoke, everyone concluded that it wasn’t a big deal. (Switch by Chip Heath and Dan Heath, p. 226)

Change can be difficult in churches and ministries. A change in service times or programming can rally a mutiny if the crowd takes cues from the wrong person. As leaders, you can be a powerful influence in how people react to changes in your ministry. Children, students, and families look to ministry leaders for assurance during transitional periods in ministry. When you rally around the change and speak positively about it, people are more likely to get behind the change and accept it. We want our volunteers to be on board when changes occur so if you’re unsure about the change or if you have questions, just ask. We’re here to support you as you help us lead and influence families.

According to the US Department of Labor and Statistics, most Americans spend 20 hours of their day sleeping, working and watching TV. So, the question is: Are these the things that matter most to you? Or are these the things that alienate you? Are there rhythms in your life that need to change or be rearranged in order to create a more compatible and sweeter harmony for your life?

For kids, research will tell you the rhythms they establish in life can mold their health, happiness and security. Researchers at North Dakota State University found that regular and repetitive activities generate safety and security for children as well as enhance their brain development. And Time magazine reported a study done by Columbia University that found families who eat meals together regularly have healthier, happier and better students. Here are just some of the many benefits of quality family time together:

• Greater emotional bonding and an ability to adapt is higher for families who spend leisure time together.

• Adolescents whose parents are involved in their lives exhibit fewer behavior problems.

• Youth who have parents home with them in the evening are less likely to exhibit emotional stress.

• Parents who attend religious activities with their children are more likely to know their kids’ social networks.

• Teens who do activities, talk to, and have close relationships with their parents are less likely to engage in violence.

(FamilyFacts.org)

Thank you for encouraging our families to spend quality time together and for providing them with ideas and resources to develop healthy, family rhythms!

by Billy Phenix

I grew up in a traditional church, and rode standard conveyor belt into the youth group. Like many of us, my early years in the group included a revolving door of youth pastors, a lot of dodge ball, and semi-controlled chaos. Amid that chaos, my buddies and I slowly slid into the role of the arm-crossed, hard-to-engage, “this is dumb,” cut-ups that sat on the back row of any youth ministry event. In short, we were “too cool for (Sunday) school.” Disengaged and calloused, we slowly started resenting anything church-related (which is ironic, since I now pastor a church).

Enter Jim.

Jim was hired as the new youth pastor. He was young, idealistic, and, above all, passionate about connecting kids to Jesus. He was in seminary—a fact I held against him. He had an electric smile and explosive laugh. He drove a clunky red truck that didn’t start consistently and wore camouflage pants a lot. I didn’t expect much from Jim. That was until one Sunday evening when Jim slid into the back row, smiled, and whispered, “Follow me, and don’t let people see you sneak out.” Sneaking out is something we knew.

Suddenly, Jim had our attention.

Quickly, Jim led us, SWAT-team style, to the darkened upper halls of the church, through a small access door in the music pastor’s office, and into the church attic. We were confused, but totally into it. Next, he led us onto a long, dark plankway that ran the length of the sanctuary. At one point Jim looked back, smirked, and said, “don’t step off the side or you’ll fall through the ceiling and onto the pews.” (In retrospect, I think there was adequate lighting available in the attic, but Jim left them turned off to boost the thrill factor for us.)

We were wide-eyed.

A few minutes later, Jim led us up a metal ladder inside the base of the steeple. At the top, there was a small platform at the narrow peak that was barely big enough for us all to sit. Still, we gathered there, shook off the cobwebs, and took turns peering out the open steeple-top window that looked out over our community. It was awesome. Over the next half hour, we contemplated the deeper things that 15-year-olds sitting at the top of a steeple would discuss: If falling off would kill you; who could spit off the steeple the farthest; and what would happen if lightening struck us at that moment. Did I mention that it was awesome?

Finally, after a pause, Jim said, “So—how’s life for you guys?”

And, from there, it began.

That singular experience began a multi-year relationship with Jim and an eventual acceptance of Jesus as my Savior (along with many other trips to the steeple top, that is, until the church administration got wise and changed the lock).

In the couple of years I sat under Jim’s leadership, he taught hundreds of lessons about Jesus and the Bible. They shaped me, but not as much as the lesson that God taught me about Jesus THROUGH Jim.

Today, you’ll hear me say that Jim was the one that led me to Christ. His example was a primary reason that I entered the ministry. To this day, there are ministry practices that I still attach to the memory of Jim’s influence on me.

Jim’s journey to the steeple top with us is hardly formulaic for life change (and, actually, it’s not even recommended if you care about liability or job security), but that’s not my point. The point is that Jim knew that he had a message that would change lives. It was the gospel message of Jesus Christ. He also knew that the snotty kids in the back weren’t going to be moved by his seminary education, a cheeky puppet show, or a hotdog and some dodge ball. We weren’t going to come to Jim, so he came to us on the back row. HE worked to find us. That, in itself, told us that Jim cared. Jim gave us an experience and, in doing so, we gave him a platform to speak into our lives.

It was risky, edgy, and a just little dangerous—just like Jesus.

To this day, when I see a church with a big white steeple I think, “I wonder how far I could spit from there.” Then I think of Jim and how grateful I am that someone took the time to connect with a punk kid in the back row and, in doing so, changed my eternity.

Who impacted you the most when you were a kid? What did they do that was so impactful? How are you doing the same today?

Billy Phenix is the campus pastor of Buckhead Church. He was on the initial team that launched this first, off-site campus of North Point Ministries in 2001. In this role, Billy leads the staff of Buckhead Church and oversees all aspects of its operations. Previous to his role as campus pastor, he served in a variety of areas in NPM, including singles, students, and children’s ministries as well as Starting Point.

Prior to joining NPM in 2000, Billy worked in full-time student ministry and as a corporate architect for Chick-fil-A, Inc. Billy is an Atlanta native, Georgia Tech grad, and currently lives in East Cobb with his wife, Joy, and their children, Ellie and Josh.

Follow Billy on Twitter: @billyphenix

by Jud Wilhite

Lately I’ve been rethinking how we view leadership and ministry in the church. Many see the church like the IRS. Our job is to let everyone know what debt they owe and remind them often that they can’t pay it. What a downer! Yet, in the gospel, we see so much more. Ministry is more like we won a sweepstakes and now we get to go and give out the winnings (the finished work of Christ) to others.

It’s like we work for Publishers Clearing House, those people who show up at your door with one of those ridiculously big checks. And think of this. We get to show up to other people’s doors and we both won the sweepstakes! And there is a never-ending supply of winnings so we get to share and tell everyone they have won.

What an awesome job! You and I get to go around and tell people they basically just won a dump truck full of grace through faith in Jesus. When I start to see people as redemptive winners of grace and tell the story of how it has changed me and can change their lives, it gives me a fresh perspective on the joy of ministry and leadership.

Think about your attitude. Does it reflect the thrill of someone who works for Publisher’s Clearing House or does it look more like you work for the IRS?

Jud Wilhite is author of Torn and senior pastor of Central Christian Church. He blogs at www.JudWilhite.com.

Every year, Reggie Joiner, Jared Herd and others of the Orange staff have the privilege of working with BigStuf Camps in Panama City Beach and Daytona Beach, Florida. This past week in Orange staff meeting, Reggie and Jared shared stories of life transformation among the students attending the camps, which moved us to see what churches had captured in video and pictures. A search on YouTube yields many highlight reels from various church’s experiences. Here’s one we liked from The Bluff Church, Poplar Bluff, MO—it captures the heart of fun and love nurtured in the BigStuf Camps environment. Start planning now to send your students in 2012!

And the Winner is….

Several weeks ago we asked you to submit the fundraisers you are currently involved in (or plan on doing) before The Orange Conference in April. We promised the winner two free AirTran tickets! The submissions were fabulous, inspiring, funny, sweet and creative. We loved all the effort and energy! But in the end, unfortunately, there can only be one winner. But we will showcase all the rest of the submissions and ideas on Fridays this month so you can be inspired and encourage them.

So… a big congratulations to Emily H. from Trinity Church! Here was what she submitted to win:

My husband and I have been trying everything to raise money to attend The Orange Conference.

Fun-Fundraisers (upcoming):

o We thought of having an Orange-throwing contest. You set up targets in a park or in a farmer’s field (we live in Lubbock, TX…lots of fields) for people to aim for. Some of the targets have quotes from Orange such as: “2 combined influences make a greater IMPACT than just 2 influences” Some targets have baskets with CUE boxes to give away or Rethink music CD’s. Give 2 oranges for a dollar and have at it! Our church is located off of a highway and we have a football field next to our church-so we have a good location to attract attention.

o Set-up a freshly-squeezed orange-juice stand and homemade “Orange dreamcicle” ice cream to sell. Even in the cold weather people crave ice-cream.

o We also had the idea of having Orange-paint wars! We set up in the church parking lot an obstacle course with barriers (old trash cans, boxes) and charge $5/ for 3 balloons filled with orange water-soluble, washable paint (like for finger painting). Dress people in plastic protective suits and goggles and let them play “balloon paint-ball.” People love throwing stuff at each other!

Some other things we have done (the last few months and on-going):

o It is taking great steps of faith to believe God wants us at this conference. My husband and I have worked in Children’s ministry for 7 years now. So, we wrote letters to our church family informing them about the mission of Orange and asking them to invest in our church ministry and families by helping us financially or sponsoring us to be further trained, encouraged, and supported in the ORANGE philosophy of ministry.

o We also put everything we could up “For Sale”. Some of what we sold: my husband’s drum set, our laptop computer and printer, gaming consoles, and furniture. We even put our King-size bed up for sale. “Who needs a bed when you can go to ORANGE and be changed to impact lives!” At least, that is what we are telling ourselves.

Lots of Faith-building…but I cannot wait to use this as a part of our testimony! Thank you and many, many blessings! – Emily Hart, Trinity Church

“I loved ORANGE Tour so much and was disappointed when Reggie gave away the conference passes! I was off by 30 pages on the Think Orange page guessing game!

SO on a much happier note, I did want to share with you that I am SO excited about the Orange Conference and want to go so badly that I am going to BAKE MY WAY there! Our church budget will not allow us to attend this year, but I think that we could learn so much… SO, me + my awesome (make yo booty grow) cinnamon rolls (produced in mass quantities) will hopefully = my trip and maybe even someone else’s to ORANGE Conference 2011!

Love the work you all do!” – Sara

(PS- Don’t forget about to try and be entrepreneurial yourself! What special gifts and abilities do you have? Whether it’s a car wash or a custom t-shirt fundraiser, what can you do to think outside of the “budget bubble”? Need some more inspiration? You can still order some of Pastor Nolan Hing’s prize “Broke Da Mouth” Onolicious Oriental Dressing here. What will you come up with? Let us know and we might feature you right here on Orange Leaders!)

We’re getting ready to continue the Orange Tour in 2011- with not one, but two days outside Dallas, TX. To get us excited here are a couple of quotable answers from people that attended in 2010.

What is the ONE THING you want people to walk away with today?

“One exciting thing that was related to me today involved a pastor who has been encouraging Senior Adults to connect one-on-one with teenagers in their church. Asking these Senior adults to tell their story of an exciting moment in their faith to connect inner generationally. What it is doing in their church is kind of magical as they are both discovering on at both ends of the spectrum how they need each other.” – Reggie Joiner

“I want to see Children’s Ministry Partner with Families from the very beginning. Knowing that we need to close the back door on the 80% of kids that are walking away from their faith. I want Sunday to be the best hour of every kids week and I want to see us partner with parents and give them every tool we can.” – Sue Miller

“Even though I work with Children’s Ministry the ONE THING I am going to do is to go back to our pastoral staff and share the need to reach the 18 – 24 year-olds. I came to Orange because I am always looking for new and exciting thing to make Sunday morning the best hour of every child’s week!” – Jamie Curley

“Until today I never understood the difference between a Small Group Leader and a Sunday School Teacher. Today it was described to me the relational side of the Small Group Leader vs. the Teacher who is simply giving out information.” – Roger Stephens

Why did you come to the Orange Tour?

“I came to Orange because I am new to Children’s Ministry and desire to learn as much as I can and network with other CM directors.” – Bev

“I came to Orange to promote a better Children’s Ministry and hopefully for me to get better as a teacher.” – Mark

“I am here because I love Orange and I believe in families working together with us. I want to learn more about how to teach families to teach their kids about Christ.” – Brent Peak

Journey Church in Dallas asked some great questions this weekend to reflect on 2010 and plan for 2011.

Head: What event or experience positively changed the way you think this year? How will you incorporate that change into your life in 2011?

Shoulders: What has been weighing on your shoulders this year? What worries do you need to cast off so you can walk more lightly this year?

Hands: What is the most meaningful work you created in 2010? What do you most need to create next year?

Heart: What moved you most this year? What motivated you, inspired you, broke your heart or renewed your hope? Have you listened to the whisper of this moment enough yet? What is it asking of you?

Knees: What was most humbling about this year and how did you grow from it? How can you continue to accept and improve in that area?

Feet: Where do you need to go in 2011 – figuratively, literally – from a new frame of mind to a new posture toward a relationship to a vacation spot? Where do you need to go, and what can you do to make sure you get there?

I appreciate the way ( ) changed my thinking. I am going to incorporate that into my life by…

I have spent too much time this year worrying about ( ) . I am going to let this go and think about ( ) instead.

I am proud that I created ( ) last year. This year, I want to create…

I was really moved by ( ) in 2010. This tells me…

I was humbled by ( ) . I have learned that I need to …

In 2011, I need to go ( ) I am going to get there by…

Share one or two of your answers in the comments below so we can encourage you…. Here’s to an amazing new year!

It’s that time of year– back to school– which means for many churches around the country- a time of transition and promotion. A time to ramp up and recruit, to re-cast vision for our ministries. This post by a great Orange thinker is a powerful reminder in such a busy time about WHY we do what we do each week and why we have such high hopes for this next year. Instead of camp, picture your ministry and your response if a child asks you this question.

The night before I left for Camp KidJam, my family and I were talking at the diner table. Liam asked, “Dad, who’s the most important person at KidJam?”

I didn’t really know how to answer. I said something about the camp director, my boss while I’m at camp. I mentioned something about how we all are important, that if one person wasn’t there, the whole camp wouldn’t happen.

Jenna (my wife), in her wisdom, spoke up. She said.

“Well, other than God, the most important person at camp is that little boy or little girl who doesn’t know Jesus yet.”

Of course, that’s the answer.

We do what we do not for us but for each child who walks through the doors. We don’t know all of their stories, where they are are at in their journey with God. Those kids are why we do what we do.

I pray that I don’t lose that focus this week, this year. I pray that God meets each child and brings them further along in their journey of knowing Him and the power of his Son.

ps. Thanks, Jenna, for the reminder about who is the most important.